Is a Platonic Possible?

Lately I have been wondering if it is possible for me to keep any relationship outside of my family platonic. It would seem that the answer is no and that bothers me. I want a friend, someone that I can talk to freely yet have no other connection with. I feel that it may even be more than want; I need this person so badly. The root of my depression is in the fact that I am so different from every one that I meet that I am unable to connect with acquaintances. Michelle, Miranda, Chris, and now Nate have all become more than platonic on my side of things, yet they are still strictly friends with me. It hurts not to have any one that I can tell this too, but that list is all of my friends and I don’t think that I can bring my self to admit this problem to any of them. I need a shopping buddy, a getting drunk buddy, a plain old hanging out buddy, but all of the people that I can stand in this world are listed above. I want; no I need black and white. I am so sick of this grey that seems intent of taking over my life. I need lines, rules, and I need to follow them. but every time that I try it seems that I am unable to keep control of myself. Nate was supposed to be this person, but look how that ended up. I feel weird even putting this up. Three out my four friends is going to reed it and I am nervous of what they will think. Oh well, here it goes. I am sure that I will feel better once it is out there, I always do any way. Deep breath. One two three.